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I know some poses actually make the sims different heights but most don't.

And I don't want my 5 and 12 year olds being the same height in the family pictures either. I like to take family pictures and I'm too lazy to go remove the height presets for them since I have many families I rotate between. Don't remember what they are called but for child sims I have (short, small, medium, big) and for teens I have (pre-teen and new-teen.) I don't use the toddler height presets now that we have infants that can act as my 1 year olds, because toddlers are only 2 and 3 so there's no much difference.) So to get around this, I use height presets. In real life your 5 year old wouldn't be the same height as your 12 year old. So instead of life stages (infants, toddlers, child ect) I play with real-life ages (1, 2, 3, 4.) I try to be as a realistic as possible.